Today, on the 23rd of February, I surrender this blog, my humble contribution, as flowers offered at the feet of our grand tradition and all the Great Masters, Great Guides, Selfless entities, who walked ahead of us, lead us and are still leading us, with deep gratitude and surrender. The tradition has no beginning nor end. It flows eternally. There is no room for ownership or ego. All are part of the grand design. All are integral. All are significant. All are insignificant too. All exist and do not exist. The grand tradition flows eternally. This is where we belong; this is our real family. There are no boundaries. Tradition has no gender barrier, no caste, color, creed, country, culture, custom barrier too. One father and various aspects and expressions of that one father. Ignorance alienates us, while understanding and awareness gather us. Man minus ego is GOD. I bow down to all the children of this rich tradition of supreme un-conditionality. I bow down to this rich tradition built and cemented with FAITH and SUPREME LOVE.
We belong to a grand tradition of selflessness. We are its offsprings as well as its torch bearers. But, we live in a world of make-believe and pretensions. We pretend to be happy and we pretend to be what we are not. We pretend our karmic inevitability and helplessness as liberated existence, all the while resisting everything internally!!! We even express our non-understanding of the true meaning of liberation through strange behaviors such as smoking, drugs, drinking, variety of indulgences, wild and destructive habits and actions, restlessness and many other things. All these are helplessly binding us to earth. Some pretend till death. Some pretend for a short span of time. Everyone pretends. In our times, people are looking for quick remedies, instant Nirvana. Is it possible? In such a world, the methods of Atmananda Chaithanya and many others saints of our grand tradition will not make sense. We would rather hold on to our phobias, fears, anxieties and ego, and walk the familiar path of certainty which we are used to, rather than tread the ever uncertain path of pathlessness. This is our attitude. Only a very few see the light. Most choose darkness, because in the darkness, we can hide. We can hide our true nature in the cloak of darkness. They relish their coward nature and even justify it to feel safe and sane. They chant “Light means sorrow, my children. Darkness is bliss”!!! Are we some of those cowards refusing to face ourselves? Think well. If I have not offended you enough, please read on… A story about practical education by a surreal saint. Practical education for an unlikely student!
The story of Manav and Atmananda
Manav sat on the steps leading towards Ganga and stared at the water flowing in a hurry. It was just like time. The moment you think of the present, it has already become the past. The moment you look elsewhere, gallons of water have rushed past!!! This is Life! What a mad rush!!! When will this restless rush end? Where will it end? Where is all this water going to? Where is the time going to? Time has no problem. It has always been like this. Only those who chose to watch it, became tired. Time is never tired!!! Everything goes through time. The people, the seasons, the events…. everything. Just like the big log that rolls up and down over the waves of the river, quite helplessly, uncontrollably and unconsciously, life flows through time. Then, just like the log, people vanish. Then new people come. Then they also vanish. Thus, time and river have lots of similarities. What are we holding back? What can we hold back? Manav looked up at the sky in helplessness, as if seeking a divine communion. Where is the answer? Who can give the answer? That moment was decisive in his mind. He decided to leave everything and walk to the north. NORTH! North of India are the Himalayas. Ganga flows from the Himalayas. So, Manav is already in the North. He stood up and walked further up north. Somehow, in his mind, NORTH means some kind of surety. Some kind of refuge, which he does not yet know. Anyway, what more can anyone lose, than his life? Manav believed that he is not afraid of death and darkness. He considered himself quite brave, in terrestrial terms of bravery. So, he walked into the darkness of uncertainty, and embarked on his search for the unknown, and walked further towards North.
Tough terrains of existence. Tough times. Unknown paths. Unknown destination. Unknown people. Everything strange. All are strangers. Amongst the strangers, he found familiarities. Familiar strangers. One man asked him. “Swami hey Kya?” (Are you a Saint?) Manav replied “Nahi. Saadhak houn”. (No. I am a Seeker). The stranger asked “Mila Nahi Abhi tak?” (Did you not find it so far?) Manav stared at his eyes without answering. How can he tell him that “getting it” was not his primary search. Knowing what to search for, was his primary search! He took his backpack and walked further. The stranger shouted from behind. “Atmananda ko zaroor milna. Milega tumko, jo tum ddhoont rahe hey”. (Definitely meet Atmananda. You will get what you are searching for.) He did not look back and kept walking. ATMANANDA. The name stuck in his mind. Where will he find him? Or, did he meant “find happiness (ananda) in your own atma (soul) and you will find what you are looking for”? The long and winding path of uncertainty lay ahead of him. The question was whether to walk it up or stay where he was! Walking ahead means facing uncontrollable uncertainties. Staying back could mean eternal stagnation. Manav thought “This is exactly what people call Between Devil and Deep Sea”. Death is sure in any case!!! Manav feared stagnation more than uncertainties. He decided to walk further. This was a great decision of his life.
The third day from there, he met Atmananda at Rudra Prayag. A local temple priest guided Manav to Atmananda. To Manav’s great surprise, Atmananda resembled the stranger who told him to meet Atmananda. He was confused. Was it the same person who came to guide him a couple of days earlier? Nothing made sense. He became more confused.
Atmananda was sitting in the middle of a couple of dozen people, was cracking jokes and laughing aloud. Even though Atmananda looked at him, he did not show any recognition. He carried on with his jokes. Everyone was laughing. What sort of a saint is this? Just cracking jokes and laughing? For a moment he thought. ” Was I searching for laughter? Maybe I was!!”. Laughter is indeed an expression of happiness. All people are searching for Happiness and they never find it, except the fleeting or momentary ones!! “Ah! I still do not know what I am looking for!” After a while of contemplation, Manav approached Atmananda who continued to ignore him. He seemed to be busy, involved in applying sacred ash on his forehead and various parts of his body, after stepping out of the dip in the river. He was illegibly mumbling some mantra. Manav waited and when Atmananda left with his disciples, Manav followed him. It was only on the third day that he actually got to talk to Atmananda.
The first thing that Atmananda said after looking at Manav was “Jad hey” (This is dead). “Jeevan kithar hey”? (Where is life?”.) Manav did not know the answer. Atmananda did not wait. He kept walking. Manav followed as if mesmerized. Finally, the whole entourage reached a city. Manav hated cities. He was fine with the relative isolation that great mountains provided. He wondered why Atmananda loved the city so much, that he walked all the way downhill, over days and weeks, to reach this place of filth and greed! As if reading his thoughts, Atmananda turned and said to no one in particular ” I exist in the mountains, yet my feet are on the ground. My body does not signify my “size”. What I see is what you cannot see.” Was this a statement or a warning? Manav struggled to figure out the meaning behind these seemingly pregnant statements. Atmananda kept walking….
Manav wanted to return back to the Mountains. The Himalayas! What Peace! What Tranquility! He felt as if part of himself was still staying back in the mountains. Attachment!!! One part of his mind wanted to leave Atmananda and go back. The other part kept saying that Manav had finally found his Guru. But, Atmananda did not seem to be of Guru material at all. He was just wandering all the time and was never teaching anything significant to anyone. This was such an irony for Manav. No one around him seem to be bothered. None seemed to care about the uncertainty and hardships. Everyone seemed to just enjoy his company and wander aimlessly! Is this spirituality? Manav became even more confused than before.
Atmananda looked at him and said “Whom can you wake up?” Atmananda himself answered. “Only those who are actually sleeping and not the ones who are pretending to be asleep. What ever you do, those who pretend to sleep will not wake up. Many in the Himalayas are pretenders. I am collecting pearls in the market place!”. This was a revelation for Manav. He thought he understood the real purpose behind Atmananda’s visit to the city, but was never sure. It was very difficult to put him into any frames! He is here, perhaps to “wake up” the ignorant sleepers to ultimate realities or truths. This made some sense. This was probably his mission. A noble mission indeed. But, in this drama, what was Manav’s role? Again, deep uncertainties conquered his mind.
Atmananda again read his mind. He looked intently at Manav’s eyes and in a stern voice, like a command, he said “Go begging. Do not return back for one week. Bring whatever you can save after spending for your basic needs”. Manav was completely shaken with this suggestion. Many disturbing thoughts flocked into his mind. Manav thought “Go Begging? Why? Do Atmananda or his disciples need the money or food that I may gather through begging?” Atmananda did not look at him, nor read his mind nor answer that question. He just repeated “Go begging from tomorrow.”. He would not explain any further. The whole night, Manav did not sleep. Many conflicting emotions ran through his mind. He had not witnessed Atmananda asking anyone in his entourage to resort to begging. So why Manav? Did Atmananda hate him, and want to teach him a lesson?
Manav hailed from a good family, a reasonably rich one. He had no dearth of food or facilities ever in his childhood or youth. He was now 23 years of age. He never had to beg for food. While wandering, whenever he felt a need for money, he did odd jobs and earned some money. He was good in finance. He worked and earned his daily bread, whenever needed. The rest of the time, he traveled to holy places or to the Himalayas. He thought and thought. He could not bring himself to beg from anyone. And he also felt that he would not look like a beggar at all and that people may humiliate him. Other beggars may look at him as competition too and may ridicule him too. This would mean great embarrassment for Manav. He didn’t want anything to do with it. He could not make up his mind until morning. At 3 am, Atmananda woke up and saw Manav sitting under a street lamp. He walked towards Manav and said ” You did not sleep? Good. When you look tired and unshaven, you could fetch more money”. And he started laughing aloud. It sounded like a cruel joke. Manav became angry and upset. By then, he was resonably convinced that Atmananda’s intention was to make some money using him. Atmananda is no saint!. He is a businessman who knows his trade! Manav felt that he should leave Atmananda and leave immediately. Ignoring Manav’s emotions, Atmananda handed over a broken bowl into his hand and commanded “OK, Leave Now.” “Come back after a week”, and without waiting for any response or reaction from Manav, Atmananda walked towards the river to take a bath. Manav stood there, undecided and utterly confused. Finally, before day break, he made up his mind. He decided to go begging!
As the day broke, people started rushing up and down every street of the city. Manav started his journey in the street with his begging bowl. He had left his backpack with one of the disciples of Atmananda, who accepted it in a matter-of-fact way and expressed no compassion whatsoever at Manav’s predicament. Manav thought that even this man was as insensitive as Atmananda!
Partially out of anger and resentment against Atmananda and partially out of determination and ego, Manav took nothing with him except the broken bowl that Atmananda gave him. When he extended his bowl towards the pedestrians, some people gave him some coins. Some shooed him away. One man ridiculed him “Look at you, a healthy boy and begging!; why can’t you do some job and earn a living? You lazy bum, it is easier to beg than work eh?” Even though he begged till noon time, he could not gather sufficient money for his breakfast or lunch. Nobody seemed to be bothered, let alone compassionate! He felt a deep urge to throw the bowl away and do something more meaningful and dignified; to fetch some money and buy at least a basic meal. Atmananda will not know. He could return back after 8 days, with some money that he earned through work too. After all, it is only the money that Atmananda is after!!! But, something stopped him. It could possibly be a revenge attitude towards Atmananda or a strange satisfaction at this self-inflicted pain. There had to be some unknown reason for Atmananda to instruct him to beg. He did not know the reason. But, slowly, as the day grew, his hunger also grew and strangely, so did his determination. All day, he had survived only by drinking water from the street water taps. By evening, he got sufficient money to afford some bread. He ate that bread and drank more water. At night fall, he slept under a banyan tree in front of a temple. It was cold and windy. He had carried no blankets or any other protection against the cold. The wind was blowing and he could not sleep. He shivered. His teeth chattered. He also started developing many fears. Every sound made him shiver more. He had led himself to believe that he always braved darkness and death. Both these fears surfaced now. And he had to face his own fears, quite alone. He felt that he could be attacked by some unknown creature, a ghost perhaps, and even be killed, if he happened to close his eyes. The darkness and shadows of everything around seemed alive, potent and heavily threatening! He realized that deep within, all the seeds of all possible fears had been existing and lying dormant, waiting to germinate in the right environment. He spent the second sleepless night in fear and confusion. Atmananda had warned him not to go back to him before the completion of 8 days. Somehow, Manav decided to fight it out. He was more worried about Atmananda ridiculing him and making fun of him in front of the others. His ego did not permit him to stop begging or go back to Atmananda. Strange are the ways of ego indeed, even at the toughest of times!
At day break, he walked towards the nearby river, he brushed his teeth using some tender leaves of a mango tree crushed into a paste, which he made himself, using a stone. He used his finger to apply it on his teeth. Then he removed all his clothes except his loin cloth and kept it on the bank of the river. Many others were also taking a bath in the river. He did not want to drench his clothes as yet, as he had no spare clothes with him. Even though the water was ice cold, the bathing rejuvenated him tremendously. He took many dips in the river and felt more and more refreshed and cheerful. After a while, when he got back to the shore, he was shocked to find that all his clothes had disappeared! Everything had been stolen. There was nothing left there, except his broken begging bowl!. It was such a big embarrassment for Manav. How could he go anywhere like this? He only had his loin cloth to cover himself. What could he do now?. “Oh God, why am I being tested like this?” Hunger was creeping in. He walked in his drenched underwear and with his broken bowl towards the main streets of the city. People looked at him through various eyes; such as contempt, pity or compassion. Many thought that he was mad. Some gave him some money, even without asking. Quite surprisingly, in his new costume and without much effort, he was able to collect sufficient money to buy himself a decent breakfast. When he approached any restaurant, they would not allow him to enter. He asked for some bread and curry and paid them the exact change they demanded. Every penny was precious for him. He started taking money seriously and started feeling the value of every bit of it. He even started respecting it. He even thought that he realized the reason why people considered and worshipped money as Goddess Lakshmi!
The waiter of the restaurant delivered the bread and curry into his broken bowl, as they did not want to give any of their utensils to a “mad beggar”!. This was further humiliation for him. Quietly swallowing his pride and humiliation, he sat under a nearby banyan tree and started to eat. As he was about to put the first morsel in his mouth, he saw a small girl sleeping next to her mother under the banyan tree looking at him from under a blanket, which was covering both her and her mother. She smiled at him. A cute little smile. She looked as if she was hungry. Her mother was still sleeping. He smiled back and extended his hand to offer her the bread which he was about to eat. She got out of the blanket and crawled towards him, smiled again and opened her mouth expecting him to feed her. Not being very familiar with children, he showed her the bowl of curry, expecting her to join in his meal. She smiled again, innocently. Manav knew that she was too young to be technically qualified to eat her own meal. He took charge of the situation, dipped a piece of bread in the curry and put it in her mouth. She had very limited teeth, yet, she chewed well and swallowed it. Thus, he fed her most of the bread and curry. She ate quite a lot! She was really hungry, but Manav observed that she did not cry or wake up her sleeping mother, even though she was starving!. She was probably used to the hunger!!! What a lesson to learn about hunger management, that too from a small toddler!!! She smiled at him, as if in gratitude, and went back to her mother who was still sleeping. Manav found himself left with only a very little remnant of his own meal!. But, somehow, he felt deeply satisfied with this whole event. He looked again at the small girl. She was already cuddling under the blanket of her mother and was probably going back to her sleep. Manav was lost in thought for a few minutes. This lady could be a single mother, living in the street. Maybe she was a prostitute. The child might never know her father. For a brief moment in time, Manav felt that he fulfilled the role of a father to a hungry child! A deep satisfaction welled in his heart. He felt ecstatic with joy, despite his seeming tragic situation. He started understanding his mission. Manav got up and walked towards another busy street.
In the new street, he encountered many beggars who shouted at him and threatened to beat him if he entered their territory. He experienced the competitive behavior of the commercial world there. He silently walked away to another street. This time, he did not feel any ego or humiliation.
He again started feeling his hunger. He saw a small restaurant at the corner. Even though he did not have sufficient money, Manav approached the restaurant, expecting some compassion, and asked for a banana, which was displayed outside. He thought “any food will do, even if it is remnants from a used plate”. His pride was steadily evaporating. The restaurant keeper shouted at him, showed him a stick and threatened to beat him, if he did not go away. They did not want anything to do with a naked mad man in their premises. He slowly moved to another restaurant nearby. They also did not give him anything. When he approached a table where some of their customers were having their food, the restaurant owner threw hot water at him and drove him away. Thus, hungry and drenched and also a bit burnt, he sat under a tree, with his begging bowl kept in front of him. Suddenly sadness, isolation and hunger overpowered him. He cried. He cried bitterly. Many passers by, who saw him crying, put coins in his bowl. Slowly, his sadness subsided, and he also found sufficient money for a couple of meals.
He had a good lunch. Again, the restaurant owner did not allow him to enter his restaurant. He packed the food and gave it to him outside. This time, he had over-eaten a bit. He did not eat anything in the night. Again, fears gripped him. Still he could sleep for a few hours. There was nothing to protect. He had nothing on him except his loin cloth and his begging bowl. He did not even have a blanket to cover himself. He hid behind a wall in front of a shop and sheltered himself from the cold, howling wind and spent the night there.
Thus, he spent his 8 eventful days. He begged, managed to save some money after his expenses, and returned to Atmananda after 8 days. When he reached the place where he had left Atmananda, he could not find him or any of his disciples. They had already left the place. Nobody knew where he was and because of Manav’s condition, nobody would even talk to him, let alone guide him. He was naked, shabby and quite unpresentable, in social terms. Using his intuition, he walked towards the north. Two days later, on the 10th day, he found Atmananda. He approached him and gave him the coins he had saved from his begging trip. As he had expected, Atmananda did not display any compassion, kindness or even a smile or signs of recognition. Atmananda took the money and without saying or asking anything, immediately distributed it amongst the people who were around him!. Manav felt like crying. Every penny of that was quite precious to him, because it represented the great pain and humiliation he had endured. Atmananda did not even say a word of consolation or even respect his hard earned money! Manav even thought of committing suicide. He was reaching his nerves’ ends.
Atmananda looked at Manav and said “Take a bath, you stink”. This was the limit! A frustrated Manav immediately left Atmananda, collected his baggage from the keeper and went to the river to take bath. On the shore, he sat and wept uncontrollably. He felt useless and like a complete waste. He felt stupid and lost. After shedding all his tears and after a good bath, he felt slightly better. After getting into some clean clothes, Manav started feeling even better. He had made up his mind to leave Atmananda and pursue spirituality on his own. He could not accept nor did he like the style in which Atmananda operated. He considered it as quite insensitive, sadistic and cruel.
When he came back to tell Atmananda about his decision, the saint said. “So, you are now ready to be with me. Good. You have come to terms with all your fears. You have conquered your fears of being alone, being naked, having to beg, and having to ask strangers. You have already conquered your ego to a great extent. Now, you are fit to be in my path. The path of pathlessness. The path of simplicity. The path of purity and lack of expectation. You are welcome to travel with me.” Saying this Atmananda started walking.
Manav found that he no longer had any anger in him. No feeling of humiliation. In the 10 days of living the life of a beggar, he had faced many harsh realities, which had smoothed all the sharp edges of his character. He had many experiences which helped him to see life from different angles. It helped him in his detachment towards life. He started respecting everything, every being. He started seeing value in everything. He started respecting food, clothes. He started seeing the difference in awareness of people. He started feeling the value of kindness and compassion. He started feeling and understanding the relevance of LOVE in the existence. So many changes in 10 days. He understood why so many people were following Atmananda. He understood the way in which he was imparting knowledge. Practical training and complete annihilation of ego. Thus Manav found his path of liberation. He knew that he would never be the same again.
Love YOU
M
Disclaimer:
Atmananda is a fictional character created by Mohanji to explain the Tradition. Any resemblance to the living or dead is purely coincidental.
Dearest Mohanji:
I bow to you and offer my Pranaams on this Auspicious Day!
I am deeply impacted by your powerful story. I just sat quiet for several minutes after reading. Thank You for the profound lessons! I pray for Your Guidance and Grace. Let me be free my Ego. i surrender to You and all the Great Masters!
With deep love and gratitude,
Ganesh
OM PARABRAHMANE NAMAHA!!
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Beloved Mohanji,
This auspicious day, I can only bow down in reverence for the blessings that you bestow upon our existence. Words are inadequate to express the overwhelming sentiments.
Love & Hugs
Gul
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I am definitely not offended by the TRUTH you have mentioned in the second paragraph.
Dearest Sadguru Mohanji, you are so much less cruel, less insensitive and less sadistic in THIS life than when you took birth as Atmananda. This auspicious day should serve as a day of contemplation to all of us associated with you.Perhaps me and many others are taking you,your compassionate, unassuming nature and easy availibility for granted.Most of us, in spite of the intense experiences you are delivering, still maintain double standards and lack total faith and surrender to the great tradition you represent.Most of us just read your blogs (some do not even do that!) and praise you but do not take efforts to raise self awareness and radiate your teachings and messages by being examples and role models. We still hold on to our comfort zones and predictable lifestyles while ‘expecting’ to rise spiritually with you and your grace – totally opposite of what you radiate.Your message and the BTW meditations should have had a SNOW-BALL effect by now by each one of us conducting at least one satsang/gathering regularly or using any other medium to share your message/s. How many of us have taken it seriously to work selflessly to propagate your teachings as a SEVA? All of us come to you asking for something….TODAY can each one of us take a daring step of doing something for the mission without expecting Mohanji to ask them!
Pranaams to Amma and Acchan on your birthday.
with love and gratitude,
Sanjay
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Sanjay Bhaiya,
I totally agree with you.
love always
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Our Beloved Mohan ji
Charanvandana _/\_
Anant Koti Brahamand Nayak Raja Dhiraj Yogiraj Parabrahma
Shri Sat Chit Anand SadGuru SaiNath Maharaj Ji Ki Jai ♥♥
God gave a gift to the world when You were born—
A Great Enlightened Friend who ℒℴѵℯ, who Carℯs,
Who sees a person’s need and fills it,
Who encourages and lifts people up,
Who spends his energy on others
rather than himself,
Someone who touches each life He enters,
and makes a difference in the world,
because ripples of kindness flow outward
as each person you have touched, touches others.
You are a Special Treasure
for all that You’ve done and have been doing for all of us.
May the ℒℴѵℯ You have given to others and
the Blessings You have showered upon all
return to You, multiplied million times.
I wish you the happiest of birthdays,
and many, many more,
so that others have time to appreciate You
as much as we all children of Bless The World Family Do !!
ℒℴѵℯ You ♥♥ OUR BELOVED MOHANJI ♥ BTW
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Friends,
What an eye opener by shri mohan on this auspicious day that we all can, in our own way try to be A GOOD MANAV in the society. Folks, Saturday the 26th Feb is also an important day in Mohans ” life as it is ” Thrikketta “day in malayalam calender” which is being celebrated with Poojas by his parents in Kerala. We can all have prayers on that day too – regards- Krishnan.m
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Thanks Mohanji Atmananda for the profound message. Your blog posts are woven so well and are easier to penetrate my thick skull. So simple yet the essence of the great Upanishadic truths is not lost. Today let us all take steps to increase our eligibility and walk on the path of purity and simplicity. Strange that it is you who are giving us a gift on your birthday instead of the other way round. Thanks for eveything.
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Thank you Mohanji on this deep, multi-layer story. Inspired, I felt like turning it into a poem:
Manav, a 23-year- old man
sat near the Ganga that’s flowing
staring at the hurrying water
how like time it’s going
The moment you think of the present
it has already become the past
the moment you look elsewhere
gallons of water have rushed past
Life is a totally mad rush
where and when will the rush end
where is the time going to
who will this rush understand
People, seasons, events,
everything flows through time
unconsciously, uncontrollably
with or without reaching prime
Just like a big log rolling
up and down over the waves
unconsciously, helplessly,
people follow their craves
People come and vanish
then new people appear
they all also perish
What can we hold back here?
Asking the divine in the sky
echoed Manav’s heart’s cry
deciding to change the course
urging back to his source
Manav decided to go north
for the Himalayas for spiritual growth
he considered himself brave
he went on an uncertain life’s wave
He went over tough terrains
tough times and unknown paths
leaving the world of pretensions
to achieve selflessness through pain or laughs
Some strangers asked him whether
he found what he’d been looking for
he said the point’s not in finding
but knowing what he’d been seeking for
A man told him to meet Atmananda
it means long path of uncertainties
how, where and when to find him
nobody could give him any guarantees
What to do, to go or to stay back
staying means eternal stagnation
going means wild uncertainties
he’ll walk further, he had determination
He feared staying more than going
whatever he chooses there’s death in the end
three days he walked and met Atmananda
he’ll throw his life in Atmananda’s hand
Atmananda looked the same
as the stranger who guided him
Manav was stunned, does he err?
He was confused to the brim
He approached the group with this saint
who cracked jokes and laughed aloud
was this the man to acquaint
in the middle of the laughing crowd?
While Atmananda ignored him
Manav wondered about jokes
whether he searched for a laugh
cause laugh happiness invokes
He couldn’t talk to Atmananda
who continuously ignored him
only after three days of trying
Manav got to talk to him
„This is dead. Where is life?“
The saint asked him a question
Manav was without answer
but followed the saint in action
The whole entourage reached a city
the place of filth and greed
Manav wondered why this pity
when the saint said using mind-read:
„I exist in the mountains
yet my feet are on the ground
my body is not my real ‘size’
I am present all around
My consciousness is expanded
there’s much one can see
I’m not only this body
with eyes you cannot see me“
But Manav was attached to the mountains
his source of peace and tranquility
a part of him wanted to escape
but he would feel very guilty
The other part of Manav told him
he found Guru, achieved this goal
though he didn’t seem at all
to be so high and mighty soul
Atmananda kept wandering
never teaching significantly anyone
noone cared about hardships
uncertainty seemed to be fun
Everyone followed him aimlessly
enjoying his company only
Manav thought „Is this spirituality!?“
He was even more confused and lonely
The saint asked „Whom can you wake up?“
The question didn’t seem like teaching
but he knew what he was doing
the answers were without reaching
„You can wake up only a sleeper
You can never wake up a pretender
Who only pretends to sleep
will never completely surrender
The Himalayas are full of pretenders
Many of them just twirl
I can see who sleeps, who pretends
I pick up only a real pearl.“
This was a revelation
of Atmananda’s mission
who was to wake up sleepers
who think this life’s not fiction
There are ultimate realities
and truth is hidden from the ignorant
The saint’s mission is noble
waking up sleepers is important
„What is my role?“ Manav thought
Atmananda read his mind
He ordered Manav to beg
from various people unkind
He was to stay seven days
without coming back
completely shaken with this
no things should he pack
He worried the whole night
cause he’d never begged
he had money or earned it
it’s what he never lacked
It sounds so humiliating
horribly ridiculing, too
it looks so embarrassing
he didn’t know what to do
He lost his faith in Atmananda
and was bitterly disappointed
but somehow in the end
he did what he never wanted
The saint had given him the broken bowl
he extended it to the passers-by
one ridiculed him, „What a shame
for such young man to beg and sigh!
You lazy boy, find a job and work
you’d rather be fiddle and useless!“
He stood and begged until the noon
and got a coin in a way careless
He couldn’t attune to this
hating humiliating life
noone had compassion, heart
regardless how they were smart
Without breakfast, without lunch
wishing job and dignity
he wanted to cheat and start work
but knew he would feel guilty
With iron determination
he accepted the absurd task
he’ll survive this temptation
living with a beggar’s mask
He drank water from street taps
at night he hardly took naps
he lay under a banyan tree
shivering from head to knee
It was windy it was cold
but his heart persistent, bold
nobody’s protection near
he was to fight his own fear
He had to face many fears
with or without any tears
all his being was then shaken
he feared his life may be taken
He was terrified by the dark
creature, ghost, attacker, nark
darkness, shadows, threatening
he had 8 days for such living
Somehow he found will and strength
to go through tough 8-day length
He decided to tough it out
to continue without doubt
He could just go back with the bowl
humbly walk or even crawl
but ego didn’t allow
ego made him tough somehow
He had a bath in the river
dirt and worries cleared
water was rejuvenating
his only clothes disappeared
There was nothing left
except from his begging bowl
He desperately asked God
„Why’re such tests given to my soul?“
He had now unsightly look
humiliated, contempted, upset
there was some money he got and took
to enter a restaurant he wasn’t let
He bought the food, ate outside,
with gratitude, without pride
he began to value coins
and the cloth covering his loins
Though he had enough money
he got food in broken bowl
the waiter skipped kindness
thinking he was out of control
Manav started the first bite
calmly, under the banyan tree
when suddenly a little girl
next to her mother, hungry
She smiled at him and approached
opened her small, hungry mouth
expecting him to feed her
his meal looked to her like routh
She wasn’t crying for mum
her mum was still sleeping
this small toddler had tough times
starving without weeping
How to manage hunger, he could
learn from the little toddler
he fed her, she ate a lot
he felt the role of her father
Though there was no enough food
for his empty stomack wild
he felt deep satisfaction
for feeding a starving child
Manav went to other street
busy, where beggars compete
threatening to break his leg
or in other street to beg
This time he wasn’t upset
his own pride began to melt
his ego wasn’t heartfelt
in a new state now he dwelt
His stomack hungry again
made him ask for any food
he relied on compassion
whatever the waiter’s mood
No compassion in a restaurant
for unsightly naked man
guests were full of contempt
the owner was indignant
He threw boiling water
at Manav, burning his skin
not only that his skin hurt
he was deeply hurt within
Overwhelmed by sadness
hunger and isolation
he started crying bitterly
letting go of inner tension
Passers-by saw him crying
put some coins in his bowl
he bought breakfast, food for body
received kindness, food for soul
At night he faced fears again
though there was nothing to protect
that’s why he managed a bit of sleep
in severe wind, without blanket
Finally all eight days passed by
he had temptations variety
it was time to go back to his Master
but he needed directions from the society
Society didn’t want to help him
looking shabby and repulsive
superficial judgements showing
no kindness, no words instructive
He went on, followed intuition,
he was walking towards the north
two days later, on the tenth day
he would never beg hence forth
He found Atmananda calm
as if without smile, recognition
without compassion, kindness, though
he’d been successful in his mission
Atmananda took the money
distributed what he gained
Manav felt his heart was breaking
-vanished what he painfully obtained
Not only these hard-begged coins
disappeared without trace
but also without words
of consolation, kindness, grace
Atmananda’s posture cold
caused more disappointment
Manav was at his nerve’s ends
thought of suicide commitment
„Take a bath, you stink“ Guru said
These words hurt him intolerably
He left Atmananda, went to the river
and wept uncontrollably
After the bath, after the tears
he felt slightly better
he put on some fresh clean clothes
thinking of Atmananda’s matter
who was insensitive, sadistic, cruel
He wanted to go his own way
now only feeling like a tortured fool
he went to the saint, a word to say
The saint said „So, you’re ready now
to be with me. Good.
You have faced all your fears
those temptations you withstood:
Fear of being alone, naked
of having to ask strangers
fear of having to beg
fears are not the same as dangers
Your ego melted a great deal
you can travel with me
go the path of pathlessness
be always expectation-free
Welcome to life of simplicity
purity in acts and mind
I’ll be your very road sign
for what you seek, to find“
Manav’s anger disappeared
there were no things that he feared
no humiliation traces
now he’s ready for what he faces
He gained detachment from life
his sharp character smoothed
he started respecting everything
and his pain completely soothed
He saw life from different angles
learned the value of compassion
he learned the relevance of LOVE
and kindness, without aggression
So many changes in ten days
Practical training, ego annihilation
He understood the saint’s method
Manav found his path of liberation
Love,
Biljana Vozarević
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Beautiful Expression. Great Understanding of the essence of the story. Love. M
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Dearest Mohanji,
It is indeed our theoretical exam you have conducted. We every one by now, understood the way life is. Let us enjoy the life by sharing what we have and what we can without ego and hesitation. Let us share our limitless love with every one, for thus we need your blessing always.
(It is always there with us even we are around you are even more away from you 🙂
When I read every lines of Manav experience, I feel like crying from heart with this practical experience of Manav towards his path of pathlessness.
We all are seeing Ganga (Every day life with works & materialistic life) and just passing our present to become past. When do we reach path of pathlessness, we leave it to the alimighty.
Love all
Babu
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Dear Babu,
I think, Mohanji hardly gives any theoretical knowledge or exam. Without us knowing, he beautifully has put us in varieties of situations to experience the life in real form. After every meditation and giving Shaktipat and after reading every blog, he has taken us to higher step of existence. He is assisting us to climb every higher ladder. There is so much of spiritual theoretical knowledge available. But he only gave central understanding of all scriptures. I personally cannot read scriptures because I do not understand the language. But I do understand life from what he writes; more than that, I understand from the experiences that he gives.
Babu, but funny thing is, the moment I use my intellect, analysis or my acquired knowledge…. I fumble. I am lost. One has to drop mind to understand Mohanji. Just accept as it is.
One can understand the Path of Pathlessness simply by walking over it and NOT by intellectually reading what it is! Manav dared to walk. We can also. Have faith and patience and start walking. Mohanji says, “God is waiting for us to take the first step; he will then fast-forward next 10 steps!”
With lots of love,
Deepali
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To reach the farther destination,we must be willing to leave the safety of the shore. Total surrender to Guru ji is my endeavor. How then, can there be fear or lack? I have put my entire life at Your feet beloved Mohanji, to do with as You wish.
Hari Om Tat Sat
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Dear MohanJi,
I always thought it was difficult r near impossible to conquer the EGO but u have shown that great Masters really reach out and show the way thru practical experience how it should be done.I am gratefull MohanJi for sharing this great story and show us the way.It may appear harsh/sadistic but the EGO is not a simple trait which can be conquered easily.If we look into our hoary past we see that great Rishis who were realised persons had not shed their EGO’s entirely.
In deep grattitude
ashok
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Love you Mohanji
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_/\_
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Thank you so much, love you ❤
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