Ingratitude, Thy Name is Human


Sitting with Avadhoota Nadananda alone in the early hours of morning, we were talking and I noticed tears in his eyes. He was probably feeling something deep inside him. It was difficult to understand from which part of the world he acquired the sorrow that provoked those tears. When a man becomes the universe, his expressions are not bound to the emotions of immediate surroundings. I did not ask him the cause of his sorrows because it is irrelevant. The master is feeling and that is all. Guruji looked into my eyes, held my hand tightly and said “Maa Tara Mayee used to say, until and unless the man experiences the feelings of each atom of this universe, he has not achieved completeness. We should feel within us the fall of an ant as well as an overwhelming tsunami with equal intensity. We should be able to feel the pain of a falling leaf and the wail of a mother who lost her son in the war thousands of miles away. We should be able to share the experience of every being in every corner of the world. We should be in that kind of expansion and perfect inner silence so that we miss nothing while we ourselves experience being the universe.”

Unless we become every atom of the world, unless we dissolve this given personality that holds our existence together, we do not become truly complete. Our relevance on earth is our constitution. We are born to display it. Each and every creation is unique and relevant. Each one has significance. Every atom is complementary as well as individually complete by itself. But, perfection happens when there is no one versus the other. There is no one another. One is indeed another and another does not exist apart from the significance which is true reflection of the other – in other words, as a mirror image. Mirror never mirrors what is not. It faithfully portrays what is brought in front.


A thought wandered in my mind towards the binding factors of the modern man which accents his ignorance; especially the colonial hangover and the associated socio-moral baggage that the society puts on every citizen. The guilt built around our lives and the systems that govern our lives are part of the colonial hangover. Our life, lifestyle, behaviour patterns, thought process, concepts including our sexuality and its sundry expressions wear thick garbs of the acquired western garbage. A true saint never wears this garb. He is free from inside. His thought process is liberated. He is free. The society may never understand a true saint.

What Guruji implied went deep into me. The truth that was awaiting the golden ray to experience itself blossomed inside. A teardrop welled in my eyes. Perhaps I shared Guruji’s stillness of being the mirror at that moment. At that moment, while in the perfection of being totally a witness, the tear that reflected in the canvas was the tear drop of the world. It had nothing to do with my inside or the inside of Guruji. Guruji said, “Mohanji, the world may not understand a saint who exists to wipe the tears of the world despite his own pain. Only when one is capable of doing that, he becomes complete. One need not become a renunciate to attain that. Anybody can do that. Mine and “our’s” should become the last in the line of priority. One should not have any expectations or ego barriers. One should be free from inside and see the world as one’s own reflection”.

I said “Guruji, this is what I am trying to tell the world since years and trying to lead by example”. Guruji said “Nothing to worry. Your work will be well supported by the Guru Mandala.” Suddenly I realised the relevance of this conversation. Guruji, representing the guru Mandala is approving my activities or asking me to keep walking and not be perturbed by the people and situations that sometimes slows us down unceremoniously. I thanked the Guru Mandala for guiding without me actually posing a question.

Guruji told me, “Mohanji, you are physically tired. Why don’t you take some rest?” I realised that my trip to London and the hectic activities in Chennai, the travel to Bangalore and later to Kurnool, there was no time to take any rest. Later on, I lay on the bed in the room. Suddenly, I started feeling pain of separation or betrayal as if Guruji is allowing me to experience what was going on in his canvas that very morning. Figures, images, people I do not know, appeared as slaves of emotions, anger, hatred and prejudices and were throwing stones at Guruji who was standing in a place that resembled a crater. All these people stood around the crater. No stones hit Guruji as he was transparent and the stones passed through him and most of the stones hit each other.

Suddenly I realized I am there too. I realised that I am not afraid of the stones or the situation. At that point in time, I was only concerned about Guruji. I was desperately trying to guard him, protect him. The unfamiliar faces had no mercy. They were continuously throwing stones. Guruji looked at me and smiled. Winked his eyes which told me “Nothing to worry”. Then he whispered “Let us experience this game of ingratitude together. It has nothing to do with you or me. It has to do with the experience that they chose, by betraying our presence, trust and love for them. Our world has only unconditional affection and compassion to offer.

They envy our world. They are trying to trade their hatred towards themselves for a piece of what we have with us. We give what we have without accepting their trade offer. We have always given them free. Our tradition has given it to them along with the oxygen and sunlight that the God Almighty supplied without boundaries and remunerations. Be thankfulness in this thankless world. Be gratefulness amongst ingratitude. Reflect them their true image while remaining your true image without distortions. None of the stones can hit us. You see, we do not exist. They do not know that we do not exist.” He laughed. “The other name for human race is INGRATITUDE.” He laughed. I suddenly caught the thread of his laughter and laughed with him.


The faceless people around us were becoming tired. The men, women and children were sweating and bleeding. Nothing was happening to Guruji or me. At that moment, a thought welled in my mind “What if I do not understand you Guruji?”. He laughed again. I observed him. He looked into my eyes, “It shall NEVER happen, (He emphasised on the word NEVER) because there is no YOU separate from I. You and I are one and we know it. You can call it oneness or duality inside the oneness. We may look and seem separate. But, essentially, we have no separation.

Neither am I separate from my mother/Guru Tara Mayee. Neither is she separate from her Guru Nithyananda. We all are one. My love for you is my love for myself and my Guru and our guru parampara. We are united by them or even we are created by them. If you digest this information clearly, there will be no duality in your mind and you will know NO separation from me. You should not worry if there is a chance you will stray from the path. That is impossible because you are us, you are the tradition and there is NO YOU apart from the tradition. If you stray, the whole tradition strays and that is impossible. Tradition is older than any of its projections and incarnations.”

As if he picked up my thoughts he said “Mohan, (usually Guruji calls me Mohanji. This time he addressed me as Mohan which I felt as if a father is calling his son, a more intimate and inseparable connection”) do not fear contamination of any kind. We are guarding you. Your job is to be in the world of various frequencies. You belong to the world. You are sent by us to deliver our principles and teachings to the world. You are already doing that and you will do that as long as it takes. Please be prepared to stay a little while longer in your body than we had originally planned as I myself have done.

No task will weigh you down as we will carry your weight. We shall walk for you. We shall talk for you. We are you – remember that always. You are providing a different flavour into this world from what we have provided. You will be remembered to be an exponent of this particular flavour. The flavour called Mohanji will remain unique in the world through generations. You will remain unique and you should. Do not imitate. Be fiercely independent.” Then I observed that the all the faceless people who were throwing stones have left. All that remained were a hill of stones and on that hill we were sitting.

Mohanji Avadhoota Nadananda Guru Parampara.jpg

Then I realised that almost all the masters of the Mandala were there. I was filled with awe and wonder. A sudden thought happened. “We are sitting on the stone hill of ingratitude. Is the tradition built on stones of ungratefulness?” One of the masters smiled and replied “This hill represents the society that all of us have handled when we walked this earth. They are not the issue. The issue is our stability and adherence to the tradition. We must face the storm of fire and yet deliver our truth against all odds so that it can penetrate the deepest layers of resistance that ignorance creates in people”. Another master said, “Remember, we are sitting ON those stones of ingratitude, we are above them.” One other master said “Nobody, no true master was ever spared by the generations that they belonged to. But, we are above generations. We belong to nobody, nothing, not even time”.

A lady, strikingly beautiful and radiant, obviously a great master or Goddess herself said, “Truth is our unity. You will not be affected. We shall take care of you”. I thought, “Those who threw stones at Guruji and me were faceless. They represent the ignorance and ego that possess the minds of generations. The very purpose of our incarnations could be to allow them to exhaust their stones that they can empty themselves and attain our level of awareness. Only after a storm can we truly experience the calm. A different understanding! A different awareness! Suddenly, I felt overwhelming love towards all those who hurt me in life through their thoughts, words, actions or just passivity while I was being subjected to those stones. I began to realise that they were also the reason for this incarnation of mine.

They were manifestations of duality that I must face on earth. This is the same as night and day. This is the same as heat and cold, happiness and sorrows, salt and sugar, summer and winter, so on and so forth. Nothing in life has absolute value apart from the associated experience. This is the world of relative experiences. Emotions, actions and thoughts are all temporary. They all have their life and death, including human relationships. Then why CRY? A master said “While in a human body, be human. Then grow beyond it and be a saint. Then grow beyond it and become God”. Oh. Okay. So, we must feel. We must have emotions and expectations, but in moderation. But, we must always nurture the eternal dhuni (fire) of awareness so that we remain in the remembrance of our true nature.


Guruji looked at me and smiled. I remembered what he told me some time ago “Mohanji, remember you are a human being at least at times.” Well, when we feel the body, we are the human dimension. When we do not, we look at our human dimension and remember the human dimension as well that we nurture simultaneously with every other dimensions which keeps us limitless. In other words, the pains make us feel the human dimension more than happiness because pains have its root in ignorance while happiness has its root in awareness. Perpetual awareness is what we are and it is an experience. We constantly experience that we are each atom that maintains the universe, at the same time; we are beyond the atoms and boundaries as well. So, why do we fear ant bites? It hurts for some time and then heals by itself.

A master looked at me and said “You have everything you need. All powers, awareness and the substratum to express it. Remember what he said (pointing at Guruji), you are never separate from us. You need not worry and NO FEAR. You do not have to be the greatest; but you are the latest in the eternal stream of tradition. So, you and us are one. Greatness happens when there is selflessness. It is happening. It will happen. Greatness belongs to the tradition. Tradition projects greatness on its projections. All the masters of our tradition are great. We wanted nothing from the world, but we gave all we could to the world purely as a medium without attachments.”

A thought came in mind “What about my global family? All those who love me so sincerely? Are they not my responsibility?” The beautiful lady spoke “They are our responsibility. You are them for us and they are you for us, and we all are one. We have no separation.” She stopped for a few seconds. SILENCE… But that silence was filled with togetherness and deepest affection. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE filled the space. I could see many more faces sitting in the hill of stones. Vittal Babaji, Baba Ganeshananda, Sai Baba and all the other masters who I have met in this life. I felt the unity and onessness between all of them..

The lady spoke again “It is with full awareness that we created you. We are aware of the problems that you encounter as you spread our love in the world. Do not be afraid. As long as you have no doership, as long as you represent us, you are as transparent as you experienced a short while ago. All the stones and troubles will pass through you and will not affect you. This is your last incarnation. You will experience all flavours of life, the good and the bad of it in this incarnation, then you will become one of us and will continue to guide without a form, based on the form of this incarnation.

The current form is emphasised by us to facilitate your future work over a thousand years in subtle form. Do not worry about the ups and downs. Do not worry about the understanding and misunderstanding. Just have no doership. Everything else will be fine. If you identify yourself with this incarnation, even we will not be able to help. So, just be. Just be one with us, by shedding doership at all times and surrendering the good and bad to us. Be natural. There are no do’s and don’ts apart from ownership, expectations, selfishness and violence. Experience life and liberate those experiences.” This was mother the goddess.
Specific instruction! And when I looked at Guruji, I was only seeing myself. All around was myself, nobody else. Every master resembled me, except the beautiful lady. She looked at me with lots of motherly affection and compassion. I closed my eyes to establish that glance and that feeling deep into the cells of my existence. Someone spoke while I was deep inside me, the womb of my own existence. “Your past has no value. Remember your rebirth every moment. Discard the pains as they are residue of your expectations associated with your love for the beings of the world. Love thy enemies. Enemies without enmity are you. So, love thy enemies as thyself. Let them play their role of hating you. Let others play the role of loving you. Both cannot be considered as permanent. We are the only permanence and the only truth is that we are one. Remember this always.

Our dear child Avadhoota Nadananda, who we are proud of, has done his part. He connected you with us in every realm. Now, there is no separation. Just live life as it happens. Even if others hurt you, you should only give affection. Share yourself with the world as you are sharing us with the world. There are no YOU.” I remembered what Guruji told me a few months ago “Mohanji, do not make the mistake that I made in this life out of sheer compassion. Do not take on other people’s diseases and baggage on yourself. You have to cater to a wide world. Remain neutral with karmic beings, remain pure. I shall make sure that nothing will affect you.” Another voice started when the other voice stopped.

I realised that I was not hearing with my ears, rather hearing through my inner ears, within. “Being a total Sanyasi is easier to handle the tasks entrusted upon you. We know that. We know your difficulties. But, understand that this style and flavour that you are giving to the world has a purpose and that is what we created. The key purpose is identification. The world has to identify with you to get your message which is our message. Being a householder, you are more approachable as well as you have more difficulties in drawing the line than a total renunciate. All sorts of people will come to you, and people will come with different agenda. You cannot hide from or choose any. You have to accept everything that comes your way, give them what they need and stay a renunciate inside at all odds.

Remember the story of Sage Vyasa when after eating a stomach full, when he told River Yamuna “If I have not eaten anything, let the river part” and it did, while Lord Krishna at another location said his belly is full, without visibly eating anything. Many may not understand you. Many may misrepresent and misunderstand you. But, do not worry, in the end, your glory will also be reciprocal to your dilemmas. We shall constantly be with you, guarding you. You are one of us.”

The beautiful lady said as a reassurance to my reluctant mind and native introversion “Remember my son, you are our child. You are born to keep the flame of dharma burning.”

Mohanji Fire

A master said “Like the gunas that govern flavours in incarnations, you will see difference in avadhootas too. Do not be stuck with concepts about how an avadhoota should be. Do not be deluded by their appearance. Some of them would be completely occupied in the supreme and will be totally inside. Every cell will be filled with pure energy without a speck of karmic residues. They will have nothing to do with earth even though they exist on earth. They may not take bath, wear clothes or even eat anything. They may look like mad men in abandon. They live as living examples of the ultimate truth in human body. Even Gods come to worship them. Then, there are some from us, who would eat, drink, smoke, drink and sleep like ordinary people while doing extra ordinary things.

Our job is to preserve Dharma through service. We pave the path towards salvation through service. We may eat anything and sleep anywhere. None should imitate us, because this is the expression of our stature, and not choice. We digest everything because of our stature. This should be clearly told to people. Then there is a third type, who would live in relative luxury, enjoy the so called finer things of life or worldly fruits and even be part of the social structure such as marriage and children, but, will be one of us. They are difficult to understand and even emulate. Their teachings should be followed. They wear this garb to connect to some strata of society which understand this language. Thus, time and again, our tradition provides elevated masters to rescue the beings reeling in darkness of ignorance to light. No guru is an alternative to another. Every guru of our tradition is absolute in their own right. Their rules are set by us. They follow the rules of guru Mandala which are rules based on sanatana dharma. They are not bound by your set of man-made rules even though they never break any social laws by default. But, do understand that they are free from all things that you consider as important for existence. Explain this to your people so that they may understand and learn to appreciate.”

One question lingered in my mind “Who is the right follower or disciple? Who can receive the ultimate possible from me?” The answer came instantly from an unknown mouth, “The one who is eligible. The one who needs nothing from anyone is closer to your stature. He will find you or you will find him and you both will remain together till eternity. The one who needs a lot from you is just an ordinary terrestrial mind-oriented being. It is simple. Those who are ready for you will be able to see you, recognise you and will be with you forever. The rest will only see the external and will leave you. So, you need not worry about this matter, we shall take care of it. A true master will look like an ordinary man through the eyes of the ordinary people. Those who are high in frequency will automatically recognise you. You have various proofs for that, the masters who are sitting around here have all recognised you, accepted you and respected you. Some could not. They are not here with you. So, this is how life ahead will happen for you.” I could feel the overflowing unconditional love of Vittal Babaji, Baba Ganeshananda, Vasudevan Swami, Avadhoota Nadananda, Devi Amma, Vanamali Amma, Chaitanyananda and many others. Their eyes of protection and power. It was overwhelming.

Mohanji and Nadanandaa

The words that the unknown masters spoke merged with my inherent vibrations and I sank in deep silence where everything disappeared.

The experience was ending; I was beginning to feel my body. The voice kept ringing in my mind “We are one. Do not worry. We will NEVER abandon you.”

A knock at the door. Kamath. “Would you like to have a coffee?” I came back to the world of my body.


Endless Love


In the safe hands of an Avadhoota

Whatever I write below, has been personally read and approved by Avadhoota Nadananda.

Flight was late. I reached Delhi from London on 25th of July. Heavy traffic. It took literally ages to reach Gurgaon. I had to attend a short program before leaving for the airport again. I quickly brushed and washed up. Since there was no time for any food, I “gobbled” a special South Indian coffee made by Phaneendar’s mother and went for the program. I quickly completed the program and rushed to the airport to catch the flight to Bangalore. This was an unannounced trip. I and a companion. Only two of us. We are going to see Avadhoota Nadananda. He had beckoned me to come and meet him as soon as I come back to India. He was resting after his most important trip to Mookambika, Kollur; the place that made and moulded Avadhoota Nadananda.

Mohanji and Nadananda unconditional love

It started raining. Bangalore choked. Traffic blocked. It took us literally 5 hours to reach his abode. The previous morning, his leg slipped while getting out of his car resulting in a slipped disc. Hence, we kept coaxing him over the phone to have his meal and take rest. But he wouldn’t listen. He wanted to wait. The love of a Guru, mother, father, friend, companion, protector – all in one. The divine fragrance of true love! The master was waiting! The master always waits patiently!

A kind of guilt for making him wait dawned in me. As soon as it came, it disappeared. “What have I got to do with it? Neither me nor Guruji are responsible for the rain and traffic blocks. We are just witnesses of the divine play. Just witnesses!”

Mohanji (243)

Finally, we arrived at the doorstep of the abode of  Avadhoota Nadananda. There was not even a drop of time to waste. I was more concerned of Guruji refraining from food because of the delay the rain caused us. I went upstairs, guided by Sri. Mohan Gaaru. As soon as Avadhoota Nadananda saw me, deep and genuine happiness dawned on his face. I prostrated at his feet. I held his feet in eternal reverence. His feet are the feet of the Divine Mother and the eternal Guru Mandala. He said “Get up, Mohanji”. I got up and he got up too, even though his face was grimacing in excruciating pain due to the slipped disc. He repeated with overwhelming happiness, “Mohanji has come back to me.” He held my hands, hugged me, and kept repeating, “You have come back to me! Welcome back. I am going to give you everything that I have. If I did not do that, all that I have would have gone wasted. You are the most eligible one to receive from me.”

Every word he spoke hit me deep in my heart. I felt that he was already changing my software to receive the absolute in its complete grandeur. This was also in reply to an earlier mail from me to him, seeking his opinion on my intention to withdraw from public life for a while and court silence and practice. He had not replied. And these words that he spoke made me understand that the question that I asked was totally invalid and the Guru Mandala has already decided my future. All I have to do is to just flow. I have nothing to claim as my own including the things that we see and experience such as the body, mind and intellect. I am an empty bottle. He said “All the masters who you met have gone one by one. Soon I will go too. But I will not go before I give you everything. I will keep all my promises and fulfill the expectations of the Guru Mandala.”

I asked him “Guruji, why am I meeting these masters including you, at their last stage of walk on earth?” He replied “Nobody has left you. Nor will I leave you. They are meeting you, to take their work forward, which you are performing selflessly. You are guiding people the way we all want. All those whom you met, left with peace and satisfaction that the work that they had started will continue through you and you will never have a personal agenda. Purity and innocence are the strengths. The world may not understand this. We do. The Guru Mandala does. And we are with you, behind you and will never abandon you or let you suffer.” He added, “You are meeting them during their last stages because you are here to merge and continue traditions. And the masters never owned anything anyway.” This gave me clarity.

The faces of Vittal Babaji, Baba Ganeshananda Giri, and Vasudevan Swami, flashed through my mind. Now, here was Avadhoota Nadananda explaining the tapestry of my existence. Everything makes sense in a way, but when I imagine the weight of the responsibility, I wondered, can this perishable flesh see it through? If yes, how long? Guruji added “The sign of a true disciple is the lack of WHY in their mind. Never ask WHY or HOW. You shall be given everything and more you need for carrying out the journey to a wonderful completion. I shall keep my promises. I shall be with you every step, even if I do not have a body. The Guru mandala will be with you. Divine Mother will be with you. Our supreme guru Lord Dattatreya will be with you.” Thundering assurances! I never asked WHY ever. I only accepted with a bowed head the will of the supreme always.

Mohanji and Avadhoota Nadananda



Mohanji and Avadhoota Nadananda 2..

Suddenly he asked me how my journey was and if I was tired after my overnight travel from London, this trip, without any rest, the tedium of road trip, so on and so forth. I was overwhelmed by the sight and touch of Guruji, I had no pain, fatigue or jet lag. There was no time for jet lag. I have come home. He walked with us to the door, sat us down and he himself started feeding us. His love was overflowing. It was palpable and every bit was a shower of blessing. A torrential rain of blessings was flowing down on me and my companion right from the palpable portals of the Guru Mandala through the hands of Avadhoota Nadananda.


Mohanji serving Bhiksha 1
Mohanji serving Bhiksha to Nadanandaji

Mohanji serving Bhiksha 2

After the food, we briefly talked about the proposed ceremony to be held on October 10th. He asked me to invite people close to me because this would be one of the most auspicious functions for me and also the last function that he intended to perform in this lifetime. He talked with firmness, determination and extreme conviction. He said “This title is not my decision. This title is not your expectation either. This has been ordered by the order of Guru Mandala. I am delivering it to you on the auspicious day of Vijaya Dashami. This is not an ordinary day, ordinary title or ordinary function. You will never be the same again. I will step down. You will climb up.” I felt a bit sad “Guruji, I understand, appreciate and honor the decision of Guru Mandala. I am not even asking if I am eligible because I have learned to accept what comes my way with utmost humility and surrender. But, why should you step down? And where am I climbing to?”

Guruji explained, again in a very serious and no-nonsense tone – soaked with love. “I have been crying to find someone eligible to hand over. I have been waiting for the permission to withdraw from public life. Guru Mandala told me “You can get off the saddle”. I asked again, “What next?” They just said “You are free to step down now.” They relieved me from all my responsibilities. I have to step down. Since a few decades, I have been walking this tedious path literally with blood in my mouth and 5th stage cancer which I had taken over from a woman who was dying. Now I am 76. This body is tired. I cannot move on like this anymore. I need to withdraw from public life, go back to myself and merge with the supreme consciousness. I shall be in isolation.

It was late at night. We decided to sleep. I literally had a long day. After a weekend retreat in London, I had hopped into the first possible flight to Delhi via Dubai and, after a function at Gurgaon, had come off to Bangalore. I had no sleep whatsoever. But, I was not tired either. Anyways, we decided to call it a day.

Nadanandaji feeding Mohanji like the Divine Mother.jpg

Dawn of 26th July. After I brushed washed and prayed, I walked to Guruji’s room. Guruji had decided to make a special dish for me. Sister Sujata told me that Guruji has been preparing for my arrival since days and was showing so much excitement, as would a mother or father would show when their son comes home after a long absence. Guruji himself went out and bought vegetables to cook dishes for me and insisted on serving me. Affection without barriers! Totally sincere and unconditional, overflowing love of a true master.

He said “I am not your guru.” I was perplexed. I did not understand what he meant. “I sign off your mails as “brotherly”. Why? I do not want to have any barrier between us, not even that of a guru and disciple. I am like your elder brother. I come to you. You need not come to me. You need not take any effort anymore. You have already come to me, come back to me. Now it is my turn. I come towards you running, just like my guru came running to me and took over my life and destiny. Just be available. Just be there.” So many things are happening already inside. I decided to just surrender and keep quiet. He asked “You have some barrier with me, haven’t you?” I said “No Guruji. I have respect. Only respect for you.” He said “Love. Love is enough. I feel you are my younger brother, even though you call me as Guruji. Let us not have any barrier”.

“Do you know who came and accepted the dakshina that I had handed over to you at Shirdi?” I said “I understand Guruji, he comes from Guru Mandala. He is my gateway to the ultimate reality.” Guruji said “He is the one who took me there. He is the one who guided me. He is eternal.” (I am not permitted to reveal the name here even though Guruji said the name in front of all those who were listening. If Guruji permits, I shall mention the name at a future date.”)

He asked “Are you not going to write a blog?” I said “No Guruji. Let me keep this sacred meeting and discussions  away from the eyes of skeptical minds. There have been some complaints about the last blog that, what I wrote is not true.” Guruji said “I approved your blog. In that case, we are collaborating with each other to mislead the people? HA HA HA.” He laughed aloud and continued. “Whenever truth is conveyed, the insecure and guilty people will say that we are scaring them. This is good. Truth must be told. You need not worry. The Guru Mandala is talking through you. Every word, every matter we convey. You have my approval. Go on, write it.” Even though it was on his instruction that I started writing, I developed some doubts again. “How much can I disclose?” He said “As much as the world needs to know. There is nothing to hide. Those who manipulate the minds of people will call the absolute truth as untruth and will sell their own version of partial truth. Let us not care about it.”

I never went after powers or titles. I never tried to display anything out of natural. What comes to us is meant for us. Never ask why and why not. Both are absurd.

Mohanji and Avadhoota Nadananda 5

He said “The function of 10th is very important. It will be life-changing for you and for me. Your family members should join us.” He personally invited my family members on phone one by one. He was coughing and was visibly looking weak and tired. But he was as enthusiastic as a teenager. He said “I do not touch money. I do not use money. When people give money, I use it for serving the needy. I do not have a bank account. But, you are different. You have a family and you have their responsibility. You must live like a regular householder. You have to lead a different lifestyle than me. Do not imitate a master. Accept his teachings wholeheartedly.”

He told a story “One master was walking with 4 disciples. They became thirsty. There was no water. Suddenly they saw an alcohol shop. The master went in and drank four bottles of palm liquor and walked out. Seeing this, the disciples also did the same. Nothing happened to the master. The disciples became drunk. They walked further. They felt hungry. A few yards ahead, they saw a metal melting unit. The red-hot melted metal was oozing out of the opening. The master took it in his hands and swallowed it. Nothing happened to him. The disciples were unable to do that. The moral is, the master could possibly perform the unbelievable. Looking at that, the disciple should not attempt such feats. They should become masters before they attempt such things. Sister Sujata also mentioned that even though Guruji is going for treatment, in X ray and Scans, no ailments are visible while he is suffering from 5th stage cancer. This is intriguing the doctors. Guruji said, “when our 7 chakras are activated and we operate in superconscious realms, body is equal to sookshma (subtle). When cosmic energy is fully activated in our system, any kind of artificial energies such as medicines or machines will never work or get nullified. Medical science will not understand that.”

Guruji explained the things to do about the service that Manav Seva Samiti and Ammucare are doing together at various locations. He reiterated on two major things – BEING PRACTICAL and BEING RELEVANT.( Activities relevant to each location, people and their needs) He mentioned that charity should not be for name-sake. We should never have superiority complex. We should deliver what is relevant. We should not delay. We should perform before time because our promises affect somebody positively or negatively. When promises are not kept, it affects relationships. And we should focus more on empowering than feeding so much to create dependency. We should hold their hands as long as needed and allow them to be free. Humility is the right attitude of a karma yogi. He urged all to perform more activities and never allow the system to slow down because of individual ennui. He asked me to keep an eye when he goes on silence and help as much as I can. He was happy with the current team leaders and members. He said activity should always be relevant to the location and situation. There is no point in providing soap where there is no water. Give water first – then soap.

He sounded mentally prepared to withdraw and also told that his original plan of the title ceremony in December had to be brought to October because of his deteriorating health conditions. And he reiterated that it is a big occasion. He said “I do not speak anything. It is Guru Mandala speaking through me. Those who connect to this body called Nadananda will suffer with delusion. Those who connect to the universe beneath the form will reach the highest. Those who need nothing will get everything. Those who need everything can never be satisfied by anybody”. “Everything is in an atom. The potential for the whole universe is stored in an atom. And atom is all that we are.”

Mohanji and Nadananda 4

The day vanished as a carnival. Old friend Lakshmi and Natesh Mahadevan spiced up the day with their presence. It is difficult to write here everything that Guruji said to me. He also mentioned about a few rituals during the ceremony as well as transfer of spiritual energy. Anyways, he would remember more than me because he knows better.

A long light day, evaporated into bliss supreme.

Sri Mohanji.jpg

With only love and gratitude, I go to bed.


A Day in Shirdi with an Avadhoota

I opened the curtain of my room at Hotel Jivanta, a fresh new hotel in Shirdi. Probably I am the first guest in that room. I am here for the inauguration of Madhuban Restaurant as well as Ahimsa Vegan Restaurant. Dawn is breaking. I am late to rise. I was late to go to bed as well because we arrived quite late and checked in late. That is definitely not an excuse to wake up late. In fact, no excuses are allowed in our path. Whatever the time to bed is, rising and shining should match up with the eternal SUN. The phone was beeping. I opened the Pandora’s Box. Opening the phone in the morning is not a good idea. Time vanishes in front of sundry messages from across the world. Suddenly I remembered the words of Sai Baba, “I am single. I have no family of my own. I have no relatives or so called friends. I have no wife or children. I have no possessions, money or houses. I have nothing to guard from thieves. Yet, Maya tests me and lures me time and again.” So, what about those who have everything that is mentioned above? Being a truly spiritual householder is not a small matter, especially if you have something to do in the world around you. Most people may not understand this truth and demand more and more from you.

Shri Mohanji

In a short while, after my morning chores, I was ready for the external world. A beep materialised from my phone. A boy from the West wrote, “Mohanji, you said every Vishwamitra will have to face their quota of Menakas in life before perpetual attainment. Please explain”. I decided to answer that before I walked across to the neighbouring room where Avadhoota Nadananda was staying. I replied “One has to exhaust all his karmic entanglements before he becomes full and complete. Menaka represents the lures of terrestrial existence and not necessarily a female. Everything must come and go. Everything must happen. Whatever has to happen in one lifetime will happen at its appointed time. This is the play of duality of a terrestrial existence. There is no good and bad in this. Rise and fall are part of life. There is no pride in rising or disappointment in falling. Watch both with clarity and equanimity. Watch the show by being the projector. Every Vishwamitra will have his set of Menakas to go through, the associated happiness as well as sorrows.”

Most of the things of life cannot be avoided. When you choose only to give love under all circumstances, we will have to face and tackle multiple phases and faces of dualities of existence, all the mirages of life. The struggle between what you love to do and what you have to do. In the spiritual journey, it is nothing but what you have to do ignoring completely what you love to do which has zero value as it is always from the choreographed mind. With these morning thoughts in my mind, eager to see Avadhoota Nadananda – a saint without any pretensions, I walked towards his door.

Avadhoota Nadananda
Beloved Guruji- Avadhoota Nadananda

People had already assembled on the floor around him. He was sitting with his back towards the window. When I entered, people moved aside to accommodate my entry. Guruji – as everyone affectionately calls him – beckoned me “Welcome Mohanji”. He is humble, simple, straight and extremely, palpably loving. His love is unmistakable. I kneeled down to him in respect and got up to hug him. Hugging him is merging into him. His energy is motherly. Strict and severe when needed and totally loving and selfless otherwise. He has zero tolerance towards someone who betrays his guru or tradition. He reacts with the intensity of Mother Durga towards those who cheat, steal, betray or do things unethical in life. He is simple and an epitome of pure love towards those who are suffering and helpless in the world. He loves his disciples like a mother. He sings and dances even though he suffers from 5th stage lung cancer. Nobody will even doubt that his body is in so much pain even though his mind has no suffering. The whole life is a sacrifice for him, often towards the undeserving. He never displays his state of body or his consciousness but never lets a good visitor go empty handed from his grace. But, if one tries to be over smart and try to outsmart him or lie to him, that person will lose even whatever he has. His energy matches a teenager. He takes rest only a few hours every day and keeps working for the welfare of the poor and helpless. He protects his disciples. He says “Even if I leave this body, I shall be on earth and will work as I do now, without change for the next 300 years. I will be as tangible as I am now”.

Mohanji and Avadhoota Nadananda Swamiji

Scriptures say that if one betrays his own guru or disowns him, they will have to take numerous births starting from the lowliest of wombs before he gets back to a human birth. In other words, he has to repeat the cycle of evolution completely through about 845,0000 wombs, before he takes another human birth. Lord Vishnu tells Sage Narada “If someone abuses me or my name, I pardon them. If someone abuses his guru or his name, even if the Guru pardons him, I will not”. We can see this aspect in display in Avadhoota Nadananda. One person approached him for initiation. He asked him whether he has obtained initiation from anyone else. He said that he has received initiation from four different masters before he came to him. Avadhoota Nadananda became furious. He asked him to leave his presence immediately. He said, “One who cannot respect his own guru has no place in my world”.


Mohanji (128)

In this context, a bit of flashback…

It was the beginning of March 2016. I was about to embark on my tour of the western countries and South Africa. A hectic schedule was awaiting me. And before the tour there were other programs in India as well. Guruji asked me to come for the inauguration of Ugadi at Kurnool. His call is a command. Myself and a close associate went to Kurnool for a day. While a few of us were sitting down with Guruji and chatting various things, a dog came there. Guruji displayed deep affection towards the dog. He “introduced” the dog to me as well. I patted him and he seemed very happy in our company. Guruji said “Mohanji, his name is Sudhir in this life. In his last life, he was Sudhirananda. He had taken vow of renunciation. But, he failed in his loyalty to his practices and his loyalty to his guru and became a dog in this life. He met me again and I will redeem his human form in his next life.” It may sound like a fairy tale. But, I have seen many such incidents of the state of Yoga Brashta (fallen from grace) in my short existence in the spiritual realms of this incarnation. The key reason for that is the betrayal of one’s guru. A guru need not be a guru who initiated us to any path or practice. It could be even one person or personality who we consider as our guru even in the mind. Once we consider anyone as our guru, even once, we should pay respects and honour his name and form. If we fail to do so, due to whatever reason, we may slip down in the path of evolution of consciousness. It is through various births in various wombs that we have attained a human birth. And it takes various human birth to evolve into the state of “animal – human” to “human – human”. It usually takes many further births to become “god – human”. Hence, we must never judge, criticise, scandalise or betray anybody let alone one’s own Guru, even if the guru is good, bad or ugly. (The book Bhagawatham explains this in detail) Take your time to accept someone as your guru. Take lot of time. Once accepted, keep the devotion steady and stable. This was the fundamental lesson Sudhir, the dog is giving to the world every day, by just being present in this world as an example of fall from grace.


Interestingly, when Guruji was introducing the dog to me, even though many people were around us nobody saw this event or took pictures of it. This I came to know when I was looking for pictures of this incident.  Nobody remembers it. I spoke to Guruji and he said everyone cannot see certain levels of subtleties. This incident was real and this meeting had a deeper subtle meaning and hence no one else saw this. He also mentioned that everything is atom oriented. It is possible to increase and decrease density as well as change form at will when one changes his operating level from the mental to spiritual substratum.

There could be various states of Yoga Brashta ( fallen from grace)

I stated this here so that the reader could understand the consciousness of an avadhoota, who never tolerates injustice towards others even though many might have committed injustice towards him. We very well know that many have committed injustice to him through his brilliant autobiography.

Shirdi Again…

Avadhoota Nadananda briefed about the service projects that he is doing along with Ammucare and he said that he is pleased and happy to be associated with Ammucare. This brightened the face of Sakshi who was listening to our conversation along with others. She has been leading Ammucare since the last 4 years and in 2016 Ammucare has started contributing within its capacity towards some of the projects of Guruji. Every organisation has its limitations. The requirement always remains larger than the means. This is the case of more or less every legitimate charity organisations.

Guruji’s autobiographical works will be published internationally in the name of Autobiography of an Avadhoota. An agreement was signed between myself, on behalf of Mohanji Foundation,Rameshji on behalf of Ashraya Trust, verified and approved by Avadhoota Nadananda himself. This book will soon be released globally in print, digital and audio version through Mohanji Foundations globally. I believe that a taste of true spirituality should reach the hands of every seeker of truth. This book is an honest and straightforward account of an incredible and often impossible journey a man of determination undertook against all odds and attained what was probably unimaginable in one lifetime. This is a no-nonsense book. I believe this book has the power and ability to awaken the truth in every reader just like the Autobiography of a Yogi did in the world from 1950s onwards. This would be a modern day classic.

Mohanji (120)
After signing the agreement to publish Guruji’s books

Before we embarked on the Shirdi trip while speaking to Guruji, he told me “Mohanji, you and I alone should walk the streets of Shirdi. Can you give me some time for that?” I said “Guruji, your wish is my command. Do consider it as done.” Hence, soon after breakfast, me and Guruji started walking towards the temple of Sai Baba, Dwarakamai and the Samadhi Mandir. He said “We shall not go into the Samadhi Mandir. Those who must meet us will meet us here in the streets.” We walked seemingly aimlessly, but, I presume Guruji had a particular purpose in taking me alone through the sacred streets of Shirdi. While walking together, he said “Mohanji, see how many thousands of people are eating their food in Sai Baba’s name today. How many shops, restaurants, hospitals and schools get their sustenance in Sai Baba’s name! While Sai Baba was in His body, he hardly had any food to eat. Hardly anybody offered him food or shelter, except perhaps a handful of people. You and I have the same situation today. Today, we may not have sufficient, but tomorrow, so many will thrive in our name. The likes of us receive discrimination and betrayal while living and glorification after death.” Spot On! Guruji uttered a naked truth, perhaps to wake me up to a reality not to expect much understanding from contemporaries while the posterity may understand my existence far better.

Mohanji and Avadhoota Nadananda walking in the streets of Shirdi

I moved into contemplation mode. I was digesting this truth. Like a flash, the people who misunderstood me and left me came to the canvass of my mind. At that moment, some words were transferred into me “Those who left do not deserve you nor do you have anything to give them. Bless them and leave them. Those who stay are for you to give more to. Give them more.” Was it Sai Baba talking or Guruji? How does it matter? Truth is the relevance of message. It was relevant. We were walking past Dwarakamai in silence. Suddenly Guruji spoke “Mohanji, do not worry. I shall never leave your hand. I shall be with you through time. Just continue to do your best irrespective of what the world thinks of you. We shall protect you always. This is a promise!”

Mohanji and Nadananda promise

Maybe he brought me to the sacred land of Shirdi to deliver this promise from Divine Mother and Gyan Ganj that he represents as its 48th Peethathipathi (pontiff). These words filled my heart. A promise that no forces in the world can break and change! This is also a clear sign of deep connectivity and integration into the tradition of Avadhootas. A clear sign of beingness and being part of the tradition. Tradition invariably comes forth to deliver. There is no need to chase anything in the path of spirituality. He continued “I have decided to confer the title of Brahmarishi to You Mohanji on the most auspicious day of Datta Jayanti. I shall make all arrangements. Be there on the previous day.” I met Avadhoota Nadananda on the previous day of Datta Jayanti in 2015. One year is elapsing. So many things happened within this one year. A title that comes without asking for it, is meant to be. Whatever is given is real. Whatever comes to us is earned, probably through lifetimes. This thought filled my heart with gratefulness. Suddenly another thought happened in the canvas of mind. “I am an ordinary man. I am not learned in rituals, scriptures or philosophies. Am I eligible for a title as grand as this? And that too from the pontiff of Gyan Ganj?” Suddenly without asking, the answer came from Guruji, “You are Brahmarishi. We shall make it official on Datta Jayanti”.

Guruji, like a loving mother..

It is impossible to meddle with anyone’s natural karma without your hands getting burned at least to some degree. Not many masters involve in the karma of others. They witness impartially and allow them to complete it naturally, irrespective of suffering or pleasure for their minds. Guruji has interfered quite willingly in serious karmas of people time and again and took it all on his own body. His body has multiple ailments, but, I was told that the medical reports showed NO ailments. He himself told me that he is suffering from fifth stage lung cancer and is vomiting blood every night. But, you will never feel him as a cancer patient as he jokes, chides, sings and dances with us at the age of 75. He makes life a complete joke and rightfully so. Every person who is a healer must remember this. There is NO healing without their karma coming in the way. True masters out of sheer compassion may take it on themselves. We have seen that in the stories of masters such as Sai Baba and many others. Guruji is no exception. This is nothing but overflowing kindness. But the disciples, let alone society may not even understand the size of their work. Many people who have been immensely benefitted often ungratefully shift camps at the drop of a hat. Guruji explained to me how people who he loved and gave everything possible just walked away without any kind of remorse or guilt and even scandalised him, spreading hatred towards him amongst others with paltry reasons.” One day I’m God to them and another day I’m the devil. It doesn’t take much time for insecure people to change their mind because their vonnection is conditional.” I told him that I have experienced the same time and again in my life too. We still keep giving.

When he was talking about betrayals by closest people who were loved dearly and were given all what we could, he had tears in his eyes. I asked him, “Guruji, should we feel this way? Should we feel at all, when people betray our trust and even leave us for that matter?” He said “Remember, we have taken a human body. Hence feel as a human would.” Every experience should be felt to the core but we should have nothing to do with it. That means, feel, experience and move on without a stain of the past. When we came out of the satsang with Guruji, one companion asked “Mohanji, you know these things. I have heard you talk about levels of attachment and detachment. Why did you pose this question to Guruji? Were you testing him?”. I said “Never. I respect him. I never test any master, let alone a master of Guruji’s stature. Remember, whenever I go in front of a master, I am a total disciple. Empty to the core. I have no stature of my own except as a disciple or a seeker of truth. When I deliver satsangs, I assume a different stature, that of a teacher or a guide. We must never go to any teacher with a filled up cup. We should go with a totally empty cup and zero ego. We should forget about what we know or what we are and surrender completely and absorb their gifts like a sponge with humility and gratefulness.”

Mohanji and Nadananda
Nadananda’s palpable love

While walking in Shirdi with Avadhoota Nadananda, he talked about the attitude of service. Most people who help in charity do it as a favour. We should become both the giver and the receiver. We should hold no ego while delivering and instead, should feel grateful that we were useful in this incarnation for this world in some way.

Avadhoota Nadananda Eyes

We sat in the verandah inside the Shirdi complex. He said “There is no need to stand in queue, push and pull and have darshan of Baba. Those who we have to meet will come to meet us.” We sat for a short while. He expressed his deep satisfaction about the association between his organisation and Ammucare. He said that before he met me, he was doing this work practically alone and now he feels good to have the association of myself and Ammucare. I felt happy that he is happy with us.

Suddenly, he got up and said “Come Mohanji. Let us walk. Are you tired or fed up of this old man?” I said “Guruji, this is my privilege and honour. I shall never be tired of you. I am grateful for what you are delivering to me during this personal journey. I may not even understand what you have delivered inside me or how you have changed my software. But, one thing is sure. This is an extraordinary journey. You and I. This is no coincidence and also, I believe there is a very deep meaning to this communion, which I am sure I will recognise or understand in the years to come. It feels like a fairy tale. Our meeting, the subsequent association as well as the events that lead us to the streets of Shirdi where we are walking together as one Consciousness.” Guruji said “I will never leave your hand. Our relationship is lifetimes old. I will always protect you and empower you to do more in the world. Your selflessness attracts me. You will never have any problems in life. We shall make sure of that. Those who have left you or betrayed your trust should not be worried about. They lost you. Do not think about those who have gone. They could not understand you. You lost nothing. They lost you forever. Those who see only our terrestrial side will completely miss the consciousness and the tradition that we represent. Understand that they did not possess the eligibility to walk the Golden Path of Lord Datta to the ultimate end. You are not responsible for that. Relax and do more for the world. I shall be with you all through. This is a promise.”


We stopped at the temples of Lords Shiva, Shani and Ganesha inside the Shirdi temple complex. We saw one lean man with matted hair standing looking at the entrance of the Lord Shani temple. Guruji said “Here he is. He is the one who was waiting for us.” He took out a Rs100/- currency which was wrapped up in his cloth around his waist and asked me “Give it to him”. I took the money and walked towards him and when I reached, he turned and looked at me. He looked like a wandering saint with matted hair and sparkling eyes. Looked like a Nath Sadhu. I gave him the money. He received it and bowed down to me. We walked on. Soon we left the temple.

While walking back, Guruji again said “Did you see how many thousands of people are having their daily bread in the name of Sai Baba today. While in his body, he wandered if not begged for food. Same is the situation for all of us. While in the body, people do not recognise us. After leaving, they will come to our shrine.” I said “Guruji, most people who come here are coming to beg for something and not to thank Sai Baba for taking birth on this soil and guiding millions. If he begged for food during his time, most of these people are begging for something from him 100 years after he left the body.” He nodded and laughed at the irony of life. He said “Sai Baba was the 37th pontiff of Gyan Ganj. I am the 48th. Now I am not well. It is time for me to remove this mantle. I am waiting for orders. The power of this incarnation will remain and multiply for 300 years after leaving the physical form. Same with Sai Baba. Same with me.” I was reminded of the statement of Ganeshananda Giri, “I wanted to leave my body in Shirdi. But Sai Baba said “Go to Chennai and leave your body there. You will “LIVE” there”. Hence I am going to South soon.” He told this when we met him in Shirdi in December 2015. Such saints who walk on earth do not have any personal agenda. They are just obeying orders of the divine.


The function that we came for, the inauguration of Madhuban Restaurant in Shirdi along with the Ahimsa Vegan Restaurant, was successfully completed with Guruji guiding the whole program tagged along by Sulakhe Maharaj and myself. He blessed the venture and all of us. This is the short summary of a memorable trip to Shirdi in the month of June 2016.



Aum Sai Ram


P.S. The above text is read and approved by Avadhoota Nadananda himself before publication. He said “Everything is perfect. Change NOTHING.”